Their rights as fe----Males

I will attempt to properly tackle two subject matters.  If I become confusing, I offer my apologies as the fault will be mine.  Bare with me.


------------------------------------------------------------

In the case of women, how gender roles are still tight, one would be most inclined to argue this: Women are still expect to be the home-maker, to be meek, take up as little space as possible, and to be of a gentle nature.  Wherein restriction upon the female sex was all encompassing, body, soul and mind, now is to the latter.  By which I mean, their literal [physical] and mental capabilities.

Women are now able to participate in all manual labor if they can reach the minimum requirements for their job.  They can use their mental skills to progress in a corporate, scientific, or the rich literary and artistic world.  Their roles, the inner most confines of a woman that lead her to be the “proper caretaker,” however, is still prevalent.

There is a misconception that women are more empathetic.  As if to say, that because they possess ovaries that they feel more than man, and consequentially are less prone to control these feelings.  While the latter statement is so, it has to do with breeding, and nothing whatsoever with internal sexual organs.  Wherein also plays in the double standards.  Where women are expected to be the gentler, more compassionate sex and are raised to be so, so as to rear children, they are expected to accomplish that of what a man can.  That is, in short, be a hard worker, albeit physical or mental, and to excel while still being the matronly figure.

In this, society has become far more prone to be sever on the male sex.  The double standard for men is that they are expected to be many things: the bread winner, the muscle of the house, the one that fixes the busted pipes and puts together the furniture [and neglect all instructions, of course].  Then, when all that is said and done, to be “sensitive” and more “compassionate.” 

However, when a man cries, is he not a sissy?  When a father wants to stay at home and raise his children, because his wife makes more money and has better benefits but they crave to have a solid, always-present-parent, is he not considered effeminate?  The word itself, effeminate, is so derogatory that the slightest whisper of it while placed with the male sex that it has become a societal taboo. 

The greatest shame of feminism is the fight to be equal to men, yet the threads have not woven around the counterpart of the very statement of "equal."  Men are not allowed to be equal to a women.  Even when women fought tooth and nail for equality, the men that put forth so many efforts to liberate women are often forgotten in the movement for women’s rights.

Is it not the compassion and open mind of men that had to move, to change, to allow the “weaker sex,” their beloved counterparts, a movement at all?  Was not the fight against slavery in the hands of everyone but the slaves?  Did it not rest on those who were moved so deeply by the inhumane treatment of, not another race, but their fellow man that fought against it?  Was it not those in the higher power that had to listen to give a voice to those oppressed?

It seems we, as a society, are quick to forget the compassion of those that fought oppression and ill-treatment along side, if not in a way, for the less fortunate. 

Women and men are no different.  Our motherly fathers are ridiculed and looked down on, considered gay, un-masculine, without work, or “whipped.”  If a man cries openly, he’s laughed at, women will avoid him [because then of course, he’s too sensitive.  Right?], and he losses his place within social structure of being powerful.  Of being a man.

On an ending note:  Transvestites.  The psychological definition is that of a man that dresses in women’s clothing for sexual pleasure.  A common misconception is that these men, drag queens and all, are homosexual, when in fact few are.  On the note of sexual gratification:  Perhaps it’s because women’s clothes are doused with lace and silks, and heels sexy and demanding.  How would that differ from a fetish from leather?  On the side of social gratification -as transvestites often dress as women in private to hide it from their wives, girlfriends and so on- there is this:  If gender restriction for male dress code was not so strict [as women can ware male clothing and not be spared a second glance], would the term Transvestite exist, as the idea and action of it would be of no consequence and not infected with abnormality?




~
I beg pardon for my articulation if I have left you confounded at any point.

The Envy of Societal Phallus

One of the most profound moments for myself, because of it’s blatancy and word for word, unweaving vigor is this piece from Jane Eyre: 

Women are supposed to be very calm generally: but women feel just as men feel; they need exercise for their faculties, and a field for their efforts as much as their brothers do; they suffer from too rigid a restraint, too absolute a stagnation, precisely as men would suffer; and it is narrow-minded in their more privileged fellow-creatures to say that they ought to confine themselves to making puddings and knitting stockings, to playing on the piano and embroidering bags. It is thoughtless to condemn them, or laugh at them, if they seek to do more or learn more than custom has pronounced necessary for their sex.

Perhaps some would argue that this isn’t a “scene” at all, but more a simple internal dialog by Jane and may not be unimportant -On the contrary.  All internalizations by Jane are more important than what she describes happening, as she is not some godhead of the story and can thus narrate the intent of other’s actions- but lack the actions of dialog or interaction with another character.

I’d like to first refute those thoughts.  To deny the profound action Jane takes in this thought would be ludicrous.  Is it not our freedom of thought that we hold most dear to us?  It’s the one freedom we can cling to, regardless of situation or members involved.  It is one thing that cannot be silence with power, social standing, money, abuse, and so on.  It drives us, even when we are mute.  Even Jane’s first major steps came from her thoughts.  Her outbreak against her cousin’s abuse.  Despite her fear she held to her own mind, and could take comfort in her own rationale despite unbeknownst to her in her terror.  It lead her to lash out and strike her cousin in which ever unexplained way she did, and it was a massive turning point.

This freedom, however, does need at outlet.  But that Jane takes the step to say this is bold, and for the writter to have written this even more-so.  Though I’ve not looked into it, I’m sure Charlotte Bronte was so beyond revolutionary and opened many doors for other great feminist writers, such as Virginia Woolf and Rebecca West, to move literature so profoundly.  Also, the misogyny that existed within the time was a rampant as ever, though women were not perhaps stoned in public as they once were, but it was still evident in their contemporary social structure.  Perhaps I’m preaching to the choir with this, though.

In short, this entry progressed and showed the revolutionary mindset of such an individual for her time.  When repulsion for women was so pungent and saturated into society Jane -and Bronte- spoke up.  They defied the norm and shook a fist at their breeding.  Despite all odds that worked to brainwash, to stifle and repress, they speak out.  They think, feel, and believe their ideas.  Their internal voices broke through the veil of submission and rebelled against crushing resistance, and perhaps a change was not immediate in her time, but the idea held and carried.  Feminism didn’t just change men, but it changed women as well.  No longer are the docile and meek seen in the same light to their stronger, more vocal counterparts.  Even Rebecca West and others have ridiculed Virginia Woolf for not being radical enough.

Before I move on I’d also like to first clarify some things:  The idea of feminism and women’s liberation.  Feminism is not massive parades where women bunch together in some sort of anti-men driven propaganda where they burn their bra’s.  Not at all.  It’s not the idea that women should bulk themselves to generate the mass and strength of a man, nor should they be pushed into it for their Feministic ideas.  Nor is it the notion that women are superior to the male sex.  Feminism is the idea women have the right to vote, to work.  That women should be able to make money for themselves, to save it, and not have her earnings be untouchable, go to the family, and then be left destitute when her father dies or dependent upon some “merciful” male.  It is the idea that women should be in-discriminated against because her genitals don’t hang between her legs and her breasts and girded with fat.  It is the right to feel as one wishes and to, not only be liberated in freedom of mind, but to be able to support that freedom with action.

Feminism is that women are equal.  Women are human beings that feel as men, think as men, and therefore, deserve to be treated with as much respect and value as men.

Societal phallus is what was to be envied.  Not the literal one that dangles between the thighs of men.

Somewhere in the between

Due to my notes being a mess of paraphrased scribbles I’ll only be citing the ideas of the Multiple Genders video.  Maybe.

And I am no way am apologizing for any language for forceful ideas I will portray.  This is simply a fair warning.

-

“But what would be the psychological consequences of taking the alternative road-- raising children as unabashed intersexuals?…What, for example, would happen to the intersexual child amid the unrelenting cruelty of the school yard? When the time came to shower in gym class, what horrors and humiliations would await the intersexual as his/her anatomy was displayed in all its nontraditional glory? In whose gym class would s/he register to begin with? What bathroom would s/he use? And how on earth would Mom and Dad help shepherd him/her through the mine field of puberty?”

Fausto-Sterling, as objective as she seems to be yet all at once in support of allowing intersexuals to remain as such, describes the mounting terror and ever present innate obligatory, self-inflated necessity to fix these humans with such simple questions [and that’s not even the half of them] that seem to have no answer but “snip and sew.”

She also goes on to say how there have been extensive studies before the time of surgery and none proved to be suicidal or have dreadful mental disorders that seem to be over-exaggeratedly rampant in our current times. 

With that said, though I’ve not over-analyzed the above quote for you -I think that’s for you to think of and explain to yourself, though I can, however, give you my oh-so-important opinion [harrharr]- I will say one thing:  Not only is it wrong morally for someone, even a “well-to-do-parent,” to choose someone’s sex for them [and it‘s not just sex they‘re choosing, but more “gender“], but it has been an accepted propaganda for bodily mutilation for far too long.  Would we not frown on and fight against someone doing this to an adult without their consent?  How is it different for a child?  Because they cannot “choose” for themselves?  I will return to these questions, as some objections may already be bubbling to the forefront of your mind.

To stress the point of mutilation, I’ll place under the magnifying glass of my far-too-socially-critical blubbering circumcision.  Males are forced to undergo this procedure at birth, but honestly, to what end?  It’s a religious practice, particularly Judeo-Christian one [and how many of the mass of people that have this done are practicing?], and has nothing to do with any sort of mental wellbeing or physical health.  That it is “unhealthy” is a bullshit synonym for saying “it’s unsanitary.”  Any male that doesn’t properly clean himself is filthy [as are women.  Don’t frown or pout at me.  You and I both know we have to clean ourselves just as well, too] regardless.  They’re no more susceptible or hard to upkeep than a circumcised male [the bacteria it can specifically develop is called “smegma,” by the way].  As a matter of fact, circumcised men are said to have less sexual sensation due to desensitization of the penis.

Yeah.  Desensitized.

That rant aside, people with their genitals altered are also susceptible to nerve damage, as they were not meant to be changed.  They were born that way.

So I come back to my question.  Because they can’t choose they should have their bodies mutilated?  No.  It is not the job of the “rational” mind to force upon the under-developed its social agenda.  Would we submit a child for scientific studies with medicine for health problems they did not have?  The only thing wrong with transexual people is the proliferated agenda that there is. 

There was once [and sometimes still is] a gross mistreatment of other genetic malformations.  Such as people that are born retarded.  They were often placed in “homes” away from their families with others where they were ill cared for and abused.  Or placed in basements, hidden from the rest of the world.  Perhaps it is a genetic disconformities, but that does not excuse us from destroying their existence with ideas of bigotry and fear.

Children born intersexuals simply need the same amount, a different type, or care and sensitivity.  Because when I read, “And how on earth would Mom and Dad help shepherd him/her through the mine field of puberty?” All I see is “waaah waaaaaah this is harder for em to figure out as a parent.”

Grow up and be quiet.  Any and all children with physical or emotional stunts, such as:  An abnormally sized male [big or small], and under developed girl, someone born plain, that developed before other children [Myself, including several other girls developed large breasts at a young age.  Apparently, that’s “our fault,” and we’re whores for it].  In short, child are relentlessly cruel to all “abnormal” people, no matter the abnormality.  Every parent has the capacity to be a crap parent to any child if they’re not sensitive to their children’s needs.  Reaffirmed affection and constant communication would help both child and parent grow under transexual circumstances.  If and when the occasion rises that the individual says “I would like to do this to my body because it was what I feel I am,” then it is their choice and they’ve been given the opportunity to grow and learn on their own.

Not to snivel: I’ve suffered from feeling unrelated to my gender my entire life.  I cannot possibly imagine what it would feel like for someone to not only feel disjointed with their social “role,” but to then be stuck in that body? 

How would you feel growing up knowing someone unfairly made that choice for you?

Our Second Son

As unintentional as it was on their behalf, I’ve been a bit begrudging and sour towards my parents and their conventional views on gender due to the amount of pressure they’ve placed on me to fit into mine.  As a female, they see me as the home maker, though encourage me to be the “breadwinner.”  The latter, of course, would be ceased whilst becoming implanted with foreign DNA and hence forth homing and nurturing a mutating leech [Prego]. 

I know a fair amount of girls might say that they wanted to rough house and play with the boys growing up and made grand efforts to do so.  This was not the case for me.  I made strong efforts to play with my own sex when I was younger, despite a sense of detachment.  I played with dolls at the indirect encouragement [buying me Barbie’s without me having to ask], and made an effort to become less assertive and douse my aggressive habits at school [As I used to get suspended frequently for beating on boys].

Carrying on into my childhood, an increase in distaste for dresses and “pretty” clothing began to develop, along with alienation from my female peers.  My parents again made strong efforts to push me into feminine social circles, but to no avail.  I wanted to play sports, but due to new found religious propaganda my parents grew all the more fervent in trying to keep me away from my tom-boy nature and more towards what they considered proper for a young girl.  Especially that I was atomically developing quickly and curvaceously.  To this day I have little to no female friends.  While one or two remain close, I inadvertently surrounded myself with male friends.

“Girls” have a hard time relating to me.  Apparently.

I have never been able to identify with my gender and it was distressing at a younger age when I was unaccepted due to some unseen force that stopped me from molding myself properly to fit in.  I don’t take comfort in typical “girl” habits, such as shopping, in-depth talks about feelings and attachments, males, and so on [I know I’m stereo typing, but cut me some slack]. 

Even significant others have taken note of my masculinity.  As much as I still dislike frills and dresses, all boyfriends have encouraged me to look pretty.  Perhaps not in dresses and high heels, but appropriately feminine.  My hair is naturally curly.  Most people have not seen or would have known that due to tangled mop of my hair to be tamed for the sake of attraction and femininity.

On that note:  to my parents great dismay, I frequently cut my hair short.  Very short.  The most I’ve done left me with less than an inch, and my poor mother was near tears she was so frustrated.  But I had reached the end of my rope when I had reached the decision to remove so much.  Society put so much weight on being beautiful [not to say that I am beautiful.  Just go with it!] in a conventional way that I’d grown sick of it, and sick of myself for conforming for the majority of my life.

So, off with the hair and more assertion.  I continue to buy gender elusive clothing and it still irritates my parents to no end that I don’t “take care of myself.”  I.e, I would rather wake up forty minutes early than wake up to do my hair, pick out clothes, and fix my make-up.  I like pants and t-shirts that don’t hug my curves.  I yell at the television, enjoy rough-housing, play video games, and enjoy my mane of wild curls [when they exist].

As hard as it is to be seen with fistfuls of males and be constantly berated about my lack of femininity, I feel much more myself when I resist cramming myself into our societal norm for women.

At least my hair has grown out some and I’m not referred to as “the other son”  anymore.