To myself, gender identity means exactly what it is. The gender with which one identifies themselves with. Or in the case of gender: The characteristics with which society has instilled and reinforces to appropriate and distinguish between sexes. I feel as though my own gender is impossible to be ambiguous due to how I’ve physically developed, it however, has not stopped me from digressing and never being able to identify with dominant societies gender for the female sex. Of course it is impossible to avoid them all, seeing as I was raised in a home where gender roles are well reinforced and encouraged, but I’ve always felt I’ve related to masculine expectations with greater ease.
The absurdity of some gender roles and the reactions to reversals are ludicrous though. Such as the example of fathers taking care of their children. Men should neither be discouraged, as they commonly are, nor encouraged. The latter because the necessity of having to is, well, stupid. Why should a father rearing children be something odd? Or out of the norm so much that society feels the need to pat him on the back? There are adequately rational reasons for men to rear children, especially if one wants to think of social upbringing. Men are just as capable as women at everything a woman can do. Not to say we should ignore their efforts; That we must show a support for a rational norm-rebellion is absurdity. That it is rebellion at all is also incongruity. A man shouldn’t be labeled as effeminate or “un-macho” for wanting to raise his children.
Even women in working situations are sometime ridiculed unfairly. Unfair because it has nothing to do with their capabilities or competence, but their sex. A woman is still generally expected to be a house wife, soft spoken and passive. When she asserts herself and shows signs of dominance society is disturbed and calls her a “bitch.” A man with any necessarily qualities for high-end, well paying jobs is “determined” and so on. Women have and are recognized for equally qualities so long as their profession protrudes femininity as lack of dominance and extroverted drive. There is a double standard for both sexes and despite changes remains irrational and irritating.
The article itself well informative, but only enforced my current understanding of what gender means to individuals and society. However, when Lorber speaks about gender being a process -which leaves it open for change- the sun broke the thick clouds of societal doom and leaves bright shining rays of hope in place of the once dark, irrevocable force of culture.
I hope to leave this course with not only a better knowledge of gender in our culture, but to be more aware of it so as to catch it. Lorber is on spot when she states that “everyone ‘does gender’ without thinking about it.”(1) That we notice stay at home fathers and strong cooperate women as being abnormal is a prime example of “doing gender” without realizing it. Hopefully progression this semester will sharpen our senses and open our eyes to things we should reject as “standards” and spread doors for more open minds and unified society. I’d like to believe I’m already open minded, but one can never be too expansive. I look forward to putting my mental elasticity to use.
